8:06 - Mike Goldberg tells us that the first bout is "Coming Up Next!"

8:14 - The first referee is Jorge Alonso. Not to be confused with Steve Mazagatti, or Big John, or Herb Dean. One could almost argue there's a bit too much diversity in the UFC. (Except for the talent pool, which has far too many mediocre fighters).

8:18 - "Spencer Fisher has one stop light in his home town." How Mike Goldberg gets so many mundane life stories in such a short period of time is beyond me. This guy could condense Bill Clinton's 565-page autobiography My Life into two five-minute rounds.

8: 23 - Fisher gets Kinged with a temple shot. When you're losing on a Fight Night things are not looking good for your career (Unless you're name is Chris Leben, who somehow gets as many fights as he wants. People love seeing terrible fighters, and Chris Leben is a terrible fighter. When is his fight tonight anyway?

8:27 - Brooke Hogan is our first celebrity of the night (star of Hogan knows best) - she brought that overweight mustache-wearing meathead from the show as her date. He's been on a few episodes.

8:31 -Franca tells Missta Dana White he deserves a title shot. Yeah, and so does Matt Serra.

8:42 - Two UFC Heavyweights fighting lifelessly and conservatively. Which one is Tim Sylvia again?

9:03 - Kordell Stewart appears in a Pros vs Joes promo. I can tell you two things Stewart is a pro at: pitching and catching.

9:14 - Andre Rison makes an appearance. Art Modell must have taken out a loan to pay for Rison's transportation, food and admission.

9:21 - Ed "Short Fuse" Herman needs a new nickname...how about "Short Career?" Has anyone every seen him win anything? Maybe a game of checkers? Poker?

9:29 - And my Ed Herman joke is ruined. Hope you're happy.

9:46 - Main Event...It's looking like a Buckeye finally put together a good game plan for a big matchup - OSU alum Sean Salmon has been pleasantly surprising.

9:53 - And, my Salmon joke is ruined. Hope you're happy. I think Mardy Collins has been training at the Sean Salmon School of fighting. One blow and OUT. This could be the end of the UFC as we know it. Salmon's dead right?